nicmar is this really how it's supposed to work?
Yes. If you don't want to change UVs (the position on the image that corresponds to a vertex), don't enter edit mesh mode. Inside edit mesh mode, you are changing UVs. You can either change the UVs without changing the vertex position (deform unchecked) or change both (deform checked).
Moving mesh vertices is not generally a good way to see if more vertices are needed. Instead, create some reasonable vertices then create an animation that moves bones to the extremes of the desired movement. Adjust weights to get the behavior you want. If you can't, then you probably need to add vertices.
nicmar when i press "Reset", it breaks something in the animation
I assume you mean you press reset inside edit mode? That clears all the vertices and sets 4 new ones, one in each corner of the image. It also removes weights (a warning dialog is shown if it has weights). Both of those things can break your animations, if you used bone weights or deform keys.
If you reset your mesh to start over, your bone weights and deform keys aren't going to be valid anymore. Setup your meshes first. If you already have animations, edit the mesh without resetting it.
I don't understand much from your video, as I'm not familiar with your project, but you seem to be pressing reset in setup mode, outside of edit mesh. That resets the mesh's deformation (moving the vertices to match the UVs) and removes the weights (a warning dialog is shown if it has weights) and removes deform keys.
Your mesh was deformed in setup mode, so clicking reset removed that deform. I didn't see the warning dialog, so your mesh had no weights. Since your mesh stops deforming in preview, I assume it had deform keys that were deleted by the reset and that is why your animation changed. In the latest version of Spine, a "toast" message is shown when keys are deleted for an attachment:
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What version of Spine are you using?
nicmar i'm not sure how the connection is between the hair and the head, as the hair doesn't seem to have a bone
Hard to say, but look at the weights view to see what bones are bound to the mesh. If there are none, then the mesh will move/scale/rotate/shear from its parent bone, but won't otherwise bend unless it has deform keys. Using deform keys is not the recommended way to get movement like your animation shows, see here:
https://esotericsoftware.com/spine-keys#Deform-keys
You should use weights to deform your meshes. Use deform keys sparingly or not at all.
nicmar is there a way to view the vertices while not in edit mesh mode?
Select a mesh (with the translate, rotate, or scale shear tools) to see (and move) vertices outside of edit mesh mode.
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